a wonderful day.

i turned 33 yesterday
you hope i had a wonderful day, you said.
but i remember
last year, on my birthday
when you waited until i
was beaming, sitting with
you on my porch, finally winding
down and you said
that you couldn't not say something, couldn't
end the night in peace and talk
tomorrow, couldn't
stay after the arguing started and i couldn't
stop crying or stay calm, i was
still jet-lagged and tear stained post
three days sleeping next to a
hospital bed, i couldn't
not flip my dining table on its
end, in a rage, a most
fitting action to represent my
inner turmoil but. sure.

you hope i had a wonderful day, you said

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